Pattaya Second Road
MENUS are often deceptive.
They will show succulent six-inch prawns, surrounded by mounds of steaming, fresh rice. The reality is usually a couple of shrimps and rice that was left over from the day before.
At Fatties the opposite is true, as the menu only gives you an inkling of what is to come. Fatty's lives up to its name by providing gigantic servings of traditional Western food.
Its menu has tempting photos of burgers, breakfasts and bangers and mash. I opted for the best value breakfast (160 baht), and had no idea what I was getting myself into. What I presumed would be a decent fry-up turned out to be a gargantuan meal that no photograph could adequately describe.
The feast consists of two fried eggs, bacon, sausages, baked beans, hash browns, tomato, cereal, two slices of toast with butter and jam, orange juice, and tea/coffee.
Not only was it huge, it was good too. The pork sausages were perfectly succulent, the baked beans made a welcome change from Som Tam, and the bacon had almost no rind on.
My friend went for the mega-burger (190 baht), which is two burgers, bacon, cheese tomatoes, cucumber and fries. The burgers were prime beef, the salad was fresh, and the chips were plentiful.
Service comes with a smile and normally some banter (remember to call one of the waitresses 'butterfly').
Fatties is clearly a place to come when you want a serious feed. You can choose from sitting outside or inside, but indoors is better as there is chance to be surrounded by a variety of pop culture. It's a true kitsch cafe, as inflatable guitars, a disco ball and hats made from Coke cans are everywhere.
Posters of British comics Ali G and Freddie Starr are on one wall, while another wall shows Marilyn Monroe drinking with James Dean. The highlight has to be a poster of George Bush-isms, of which my favourite was: "It's clearly a budget: it's got a lot of numbers."
But it is the food that's justifiably the main attraction. The breakfast options take up a couple of pages, and elsewhere there is Shepherd's Pie for 210 baht, chicken kiev for 240 baht, or fish and chips for 260 baht.
There's also a small Mexican and Thai menu if you fancy something more exotic.
Should you find space for dessert - and believe me, you'll struggle - then there's apple pie, pancakes or ice-cream to choose from.